Vale Dog Park

Dog Park, the ABC’s post-Muster Dogs, canine-focused dramedy, about people who’ve become friends because they take their dogs to the same park, has ended. We will not miss it. Because while there’s worse TV out there, it’s hard to like a show which spends more time trying to tug at your heartstrings than it does making you give a damn about any of the characters.

The main character, Roland (Leon Ford, who also co-created the series), is a fed-up, middle-aged father and misanthrope, although rarely in a funny or interesting way. He can occasionally liven up the show when he blurts out a genuinely funny observation about some aspect of contemporary life, which makes you laugh hard with recognition. Maybe he’s the next Basil Fawlty, you think. Or Bernard Black. Or Victor Meldrew. Don’t be fooled. This is a dramedy in 2026; Roland won’t be funny again until the next episode. If that!

In fact, there are more scenes of Roland sitting, looking sad in his house, drinking booze, than there are of him being funny or interesting. And when you consider that, say, Fisk is capable of getting its characters to be funny, and interesting, and make astute observations about contemporary life multiple times per scene, then what are we doing watching Dog Park?

There were some other characters in the show, too, like Samantha (Celia Pacquola), who’s a potential love interest for Roland, except she’s about to get married, and he’s already married. And there’s Penny (Elizabeth Alexander), who is an older woman with a dog that farts a lot and then dies. And Pamelia (Grace Chow), who doesn’t have a dog, wears bonnets and is sad about something we never quite learn about. And Jonah (Ras-Samuel), who doesn’t want to work for his father anymore. But these characters get so little development that they’re basically background colour. In fact, if you drift off a bit whilst watching Dog Park – something that’s incredibly easy to do – you find yourself wondering who they all are and why the makers even bothered to put them in the show.

As for the plot, beyond the trouble with Roland’s marriage to Emma (Brooke Satchwell) and his potential affair with Samantha, it’s business as usual for this kind of dramedy, i.e. someone dies in the fifth episode (aaawww), and there’s some kind of wedding in episode six (aaawww again). Like we’ve said before, these shows are very much written to a formula.

Although, unlike every other show of this type, the possibility of a second series, which of course the show teases in the final episode, might not happen, because Matchbox Productions, which made the show, is being shut down by its owner, Universal International Studios.

“The sudden departure by the Hollywood heavyweight casts doubt on the possibility of a second season” says The Guardian. Which is great news as far as anyone who likes decent comedy is concerned, although rather less good news when you read The Guardian’s article further and discover the closure of Matchbox Pictures means that 30 people have lost their jobs.

So what have we learnt from Dog Park? That the slavish adherence to “a death in episode five, a wedding in episode six” doesn’t guarantee longevity? Don’t be ridiculous. The Australian television industry has plenty more shows like Dog Park in it before it finally gives up on that. The best we can hope for is that maybe someone out there spots that an unfunny middle-aged moaner drinking wine isn’t exactly great entertainment. Unless it’s Bernard Black, of course.