Australian Tumbleweeds

The polling booth has been open for almost a week now and surprise surprise, votes have actually been coming in. It seems that people really do want to take advantage of the opportunity to express their dismay with much of the current crop of Aussie comedy. But with our rising fame comes the dark side of success – voting scandals! Yep, a suspicious surge in votes for Lady Julia Morris’s book soon led to this little discovery.

But what to do? There’s no hard-and-fast rule against spruiking for votes – seriously, why would you want to? – but actually wanting to win a Tumblie is the kind of “ironic” appreciation of things that leads to finding much of Chris Lilley’s output funny. Not to mention that, unlike most wacky internet awards ceremonies for lame entertainment, we’re not really the kind of people who secretly enjoy crap or find it amusing in a “so-bad-it’s-good” fashion. Amazingly, we pretty much mean what we say, so all winning a Tumblie earns you is a burst of pointed and often very ugly invective that might not look good in a press release. Especially if we know that a press release is what the winner is hoping to get out of the experience.

Still, it’s early days yet, and a bunch of Wil Anderson haters could still lurch out of the woodwork to snatch Lady Morris’ prize from her grasp. All this year’s nominees would make for worthy winners in our book. Just keep in mind that, as uncool as it might be in yet another age of irony (what is this, the fifth?), these awards operate entirely at face value. So if you’re going to vote, make sure you mean it: ironic or not, shit is still shit.

The nominations have been counted, and the top three in each category have made it to the final round of voting. So what now?

How to Vote
Please select one choice in each category (or vote only in the categories you wish to vote in), then either post your choices as a comment on this post or e-mail them to australiantumbleweeds@yahoo.com.au. Don’t forget to include your comments on whoever or whatever you’ve chosen in each category, but please be aware that we may publish these when we release the results. Voting closes at 11.59pm EST on 31st December 2009. The results will be released on or about Australia Day 2010.

WORST NEWCOMER
The Handsomity Institute (creators of Beached Az)
The cast of Hungry Beast
Josh Thomas (Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation)

WORST NEW COMEDY
Beached Az
Double Take
Hungry Beast

WORST ACTOR
Paul Hogan (Charlie & Boots)
Dan Ilic (Hungry Beast)
Sam Simmons (Urban Monkey)

WORST ACTRESS
Emily Rose Brennan (:30 Seconds)
Veronica Milsom (Hungry Beast)
Caroline Reid (Pam Ann Show)

WORST ENTERTAINMENT PERSONALITY
Wil Anderson (The Gruen Transfer)
Dave Hughes (The 7PM Project)
Daryl Somers (Hey Hey It’s Saturday – The Reunion)

WORST ENTERTAINMENT PROGRAMME
Good News Week
Hey Hey It’s Saturday – The Reunion
Hungry Beast

WORST SITCOM
:30 Seconds
Beached Az
Chandon Pictures

WORST STAND-UP
Wil Anderson
Dave Hughes
Sam Simmons

WORST GAME OR PANEL SHOW
Good News Week
The Gruen Transfer
The 7PM Project

WORST FILM
Charlie & Boots
Going Down Under
Guru Wayne

WORST SKETCH SHOW
Double Take
Hungry Beast
The Urban Monkey with Murray Foote

WORST OVERALL COMEDY
Double Take
Good News Week
Hey Hey It’s Saturday – The Reunion

WORST OVERALL CHANNEL / NETWORK FOR COMEDY
Nine
Seven
Triple M

WORST RADIO COMEDY
Hughesy & Kate (Nova 100 Melbourne)
Kyle & Jackie O (2Day FM)
Sam Simmons (Triple J)

WORST RADIO PERSONALITY
Scott Dooley (Triple J Drive)
Kyle Sandilands (2Day FM Breakfast)
Matt Tilley (Fox FM Breakfast)

WORST PODCAST OR CD
Hughesy & Kate (Podcast)
Robbie, Marieke & The Doctor (Podcast)
Matt Tilley’s Gotcha Calls: The Final Call (CD)

WORST BOOK OR ITEM OF SPIN-OFF MERCHANDISE
The Chaser Annual 2009: The E-mail Eunuch
Don’t You Know Who I Used to Be? by Julia Morris
Friendly Fire by Wil Anderson

WORST DVD
Dave Hughes is Handy (Dave Hughes)
Make Deadshits History (Heath Franklin’s Chopper)
Wilosophy (Wil Anderson)

MOST USELESS PANEL / TALKSHOW GUEST
Amanda Keller (Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation)
Ruby Rose (The 7PM Project/Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation)
Josh Thomas (Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation)

THE ROBERT FIDGEON MEMORIAL AWARD FOR WORST CRITIC
Marieke Hardy
Gerard and Mark Henderson for their attacks on “left wing comedy” (i.e. The Chaser and Clarke & Dawe)
Neil Mitchell for his attack on Shaun Micallef

MOST OVER-RATED COMEDY
The Chaser’s War on Everything
Spicks & Specks
Talkin’ ‘Bout Your Generation

MOST UNNECESSARILY OVER-EXPOSED COMEDIAN
Dave Hughes
Charlie Pickering
Josh Thomas

LEAST HOPED-FOR RETURN
The Chaser’s War On Everything
Hey Hey It’s Saturday/Daryl Somers
Thank God You’re Here

MOST DISAPPOINTING COMEDY
Hungry Beast
The Jesters
TV Burp

MOST DISAPPOINTING COMEDIAN(S)
The Chaser team
Rove McManus
Charlie Pickering

THE ‘PISSING ON THEIR LEGACY’ AWARD
Hey Hey It’s Saturday/Daryl Somers
Paul Hogan
Working Dog

MOST IRRITATING OR POINTLESS CAMEO
Tony Martin in anything which isn’t his own show (because c’mon – he deserves his own show more than anyone currently with a show)
Sitcom writer/producers awkwardly shoe-horning their comedy mates into guest roles (e.g. Peter Moon’s mates in Whatever Happened To That Guy and Robin Butler and Wayne Hope’s mates in The Librarians)
Steve Vizard in The Jesters

MOST HYSTERICAL TABLOID HATE CAMPAIGN
The Chaser’s “Make A Realistic Wish Foundation” sketch scandal
The Double Take school bullying sketch beat-up
Herald Sun vs John Safran’s Race Relations

THE ‘TRIPLE M RE-ALLOCATING RESOURCES’ MEMORIAL AWARD FOR BIGGEST MANAGERIAL COCK-UP
The ABC’s cowardice over The Chaser’s “Make A Realistic Wish Foundation” sketch scandal
Nine bringing back Hey Hey
Seven giving Double Take precedence over TV Burp

MOST BLATANT PLAGIARISM
:30 Seconds of The Gruen Transfer
The Chaser of many, many things
Hungry Beast of Media Watch, “yoof TV” and UK critic Charlie Brooker

THE LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT AWARD FOR CRAP COMEDY
John Blackman
Andrew Denton
Daryl Somers

BEST NEW COMEDY
Dave in the Life
Lawrence Leung’s Choose Your Own Adventure
John Safran’s Race Relations

BEST COMEDY
A Nest Of Occcasionals by Tony Martin
Clarke & Dawe on The 7.30 Report
His Generation by Shaun Micallef